Church of Christ, Feline-ist

Forgive me Father for I have sinned... I have never been to confession. You see, 5 years and 10 months ago I was birthed as a dark cat in the junkyard of evil. Overwhelmed by my aura, my mother chose to immediately flee this Earth by way of car, however I used the strength of my mind to nurse myself to life. Father, I cannot help that I have been created by the lord of dark cats, equipt with extremely sharp teeth and the desire to bite. It is only my nature. I cannot help my fascination with necks, as the dark side whispers that this is the easiest way to kill my prey. But I desperately want to be good, so here I am, confessing that I have sinned with my actions and my thoughts.

I JUST WANT TO TAKE A DAMN NAP AND WAKE UP WITHOUT THE NEED TO DESTROY EVERYTHING. IT'S SO FRIGGEN EXHAUSTING.